25

1. I'm not nearly as extroverted as I come across. For all that I'm comfortable sharing, I'm a private person.
2. I spent years doing theatre and I briefly studied opera. (I'm a basso profundo.)
3. Graduating valedictorian in 8th grade, I held the record for most suspensions.
4. I lived in abject terror as a child, until I got smart and accustomed myself to the immutable situation, giving my adrenal glands a rest in the process. The State removed me from my home years too late, just to return me. My childhood domestic abuse required years of speech therapy, though my chipped tooth and wrist scar are, ironically, both from accidents. (After ten years of estrangement, I finally added Mother to my speed-dial.)
5. I compartmentalize everything: My heart and my mind belong to two discrete political parties. Not surprisingly, what I find aesthetically pleasing in another person rarely translates to sexual attraction; conversely, what I find physically attractive doesn't usually appeal to my visual taste. (However, given enough time and thought, I can turn anyone into the object of my desire.) Only once have I been sexually abused by someone I found attractive. I own several albums from vocalists I can't stand who pen phenomenal lyrics and write beautiful instrumental parts.
6. I feel closest to G-D and the rest of humanity when dancing, and I've been paid to do so in various states of undress. I've been known to cry when dancing or experiencing any artistic medium. (Though I was a raver, I never did Ecstasy.)
7. I prefer houses to condominiums.
8. I was raised in a conservative Southern Baptist household, but went to a predominantly Jewish high school. (Coincidentally, I have a thing for Jews with Southern accents.)
9. The first crush that I can remember was on Dark Heart, from the second Care Bears movie. (I've always been enamored with repentant sociopaths.)
10. I used to write lyrics for industrial, hip-hop, and folk songs. (But, my favorite music to listen to is lyric free and in a minor key, even though I have a word fetish.)
11. I spent the week leading up to my 18th birthday institutionalized for my sexuality. (I whiled the week away counseling my fellow inmates.)
12. My life's ambition is to run my own social services non-profit organization, to eventually be the US Secretary of Education, and to be a parent. (Paradoxically, I really wish I were a monk.)
13. I think of myself as Orlando Ndegéocello Lark, but introduce myself as Lark.
14. I received both my GED and Ivy League recruitment letters in the same mailbox. This makes me self-conscious in some conflicting ways. Regardless, I love being the most ignorant person in the room as it gives me an opportunity to learn more.
15. I'm a hopeful romantic: I still have my favorite valentine, a layered 2-dimensional handmade representation of a four-chambered heart; I've also had my wedding planned for almost a decade. (My funeral, too.)
16. I enjoy writing poetry and came out onstage while performing at my high school poetry slam when I was 16.
17. I'm vegetarian. (I refuse to assassinate mosquitoes, but I have a penchant for leather.) My favorite beverages are cow's milk and water (separately).
18. I've a keen interest in various esoteric branches of Judæo-Christianity, particularly Gnosticism. I learned how to read from the Protestant Christian Bible at age 2. The first novel I read was Stephen King's "It" in kindergarten. (There is a connection, I assure you.)
19. I've beaten people for money (at their request). I've also been set aflame (with my consent). I have other fetishes that I shall not list here. I am a private person, after all.
20. I spent a lot of time in the bathroom as a child. (It was the only door with a lock.) I spent most of my childhood alone, when possible.
21. It would take immortality to sate my lust for literature, music, and film. (I read every volume of the World Book Encyclopedias as a child, own over 700 physical CDs, and almost a hundred DVDs.) I read the world and national news every morning. (Important local news trickles down.) I haven't had a television for eleven years, but the amount of time I spend in front of a computer screen precludes any self-righteousness. I own complete series that I've never seen on a television. HBO on DVD, anyone?
22. My twin was flushed down the toilet before I was born.
23. Sometimes, I have relapsing control issues with my weight.
24. I'm making a third of what I used to—if that—and I've never been happier!
25. I have no concept of time. None. At all. Whatsoever. My memory is a spilled box of jumbled Polaroids, with little continuity. Despite this, I can relive all my memories with astonishing emotional detail.